When it Doesn't Feel Merry 2020

This time of year can feel like magic and it can also be a time of stress and sadness; particularly this year where many of us are staying distanced.

It may sound counterintuitive, but the best way to get through negative emotions is to feel them.

I get it, you don’t want to feel them-you’d rather avoid them at all costs-but the truth is, pushing emotions away only makes the come back with a vengeance.

Think of pushing away feelings like a dam-the water just builds up behind it until the dam breaks-or you find yourself yelling at your partner over nothing when the proverbial dam breaks.

I invite you to put down whatever you normally use to push the emotions away. For example, my own form of avoiding can look like being busy, eating junk, or zoning in front of the TV. I wonder if yours are similar?

An emotion only lasts about 90 seconds. It seems longer because you keep thinking about it.

Instead, sit with the emotional discomfort. Let it run its course. Be sad, angry, frustrated-whatever it is-let it be. Just don’t set up camp there for the long haul.

When the emotion starts to subside, you can shift your focus. If finding gratitude feels good, go there. If that feels like too big of a leap-and it can-then just shift to something you can appreciate.

This year is like no other and it begs for kindness toward yourself. I invite you to answer the call-even if that isn’t how you normally operate. It’s time.