I would bet money that you would drop anything if a friend needed help. But, what happens when YOU need something? Do you google? Muddle through? Figure it out? Why don't we ask for help or input when we need it? What are you thinking when you decide you’ll just muscle through? Maybe it’s a belief that you are capable and you can figure it out. Or maybe it comes from not wanting to be seen as incompetent, like you can’t handle it, or less than? Sound familiar? Most of the women I work with DO NOT WANT TO BE JUDGED. Who does? We don’t want anyone to see our “weaknesses”. But, let's turn that around...if you’re not a doctor is it a weakness to not be able to perform surgery? Or to go to medica
People who know me well, know that meal planning and cooking is not my thing. At the point in the COVID outbreak before the shelter-in-place order but about the time we were starting to feel slightly uneasy about going out in public my family spontaneously included my elderly mom and daughter’s boyfriend in dinner one night without planning, prep or much food in the house. How do you think I showed up for that dinner? Did I allow myself to go with the flow and enjoy the company? Hell no! I was grumpy and my inner critic was fixated on how I’d messed up the dishes I'd made. I’m not at my best when my thoughts are stuck in have to, should, and burden. The next morning I decided this isn’t how
Does anyone else get really effing irritated when you ask the kid to empty the dishwasher and they don’t do it right then? Or for the next two hours? Or you ask a colleague for help on a project and they just don’t get your vision or don’t keep track of items the way you would? The option at that point is to nag, feel resentful or just do it myself. Right?! OR we could let go of how and when we think it should be done. I’m guilty of asking for help and expecting it to be done right then, particularly at home. What if your way isn’t the only way? There is room for educating and setting expectations, but there is also room for things to be done another way. So often we are heads down in gettin
Mama I see you. I see you running the show, making sure all the people in your life are taken care of, and crossing sh*t off your never ending to-do list. Even now. Maybe more so now. Some of you have had to become a homeschool teacher or your kids are knocking on your closet door where you are hiding trying to do your Zoom call for work. Maybe you are alone and isolated. Perhaps you have the added task of checking in on older parents. But, what I want to ask is who is taking care of you? I know your shoulders are heavy. I know you carry a lot. I see this even if you live alone. Where are you in this uncertain time? I have been shouting from the rooftops long before COVID-19 hit that the ide
"I'm sick of all the emails and social media posts telling us what to do and how to feel" That was the consensus from a virtual call with friends last night. They're tired not only of the random companies reaching out to share their COVID-19 response, but also the gurus they've been following for years. The sense from the group was that we are full. We are on information overload, it's time to just be. I wonder if that's true for you too? It's ok to feel however you feel. If you're scared, fed up, tired, frustrated, anxious, angry, short-tempered, feeling guilty, optimistic, empowered or all of the above at various times...it's ok. We are human with a wide range of emotions and there is no p
