Navigating Holiday Expectations - And Learning to Be Confident in Your Choices
I love to get into the “why” behind what my clients are doing. What’s the motivation? What’s driving their behavior?
When they’re frustrated or overwhelmed, asking them to remember their why is a great way to come back to what’s important to them.
One of my clients is a middle school teacher who is passionate about making an impact on her students. When she’s had a tough day, it can be super helpful to remind herself WHY she shows up every day.
AND it’s equally important to see what’s behind what you DON’T want to continue doing.
Especially this time of year.
If you don’t want to go to Aunt Peg’s for the holiday, WHY are you??
Is it because you think you should?
Are you worried about disappointing someone?
You could substitute any demands on your time for the Aunt Peg question. Why are you saying yes when you don’t want to???
Shoulding, worrying what people will think, and fear of letting someone down generally aren’t motivators that leave us feeling very good.
It not only colors your decision, but can also impact how you show up at an event.
Think about how you feel when there’s something you're excited to do vs something you’re dreading.
So, do you like your reasons why you’re saying yes?
If not, here’s your invitation to do it differently.
Take the Aunt Peg example….
If you don’t love going there, you could say no. It doesn’t make you a bad person, no matter what anyone says.
Or maybe having you at Aunt Peg’s really matters to your mom and being with your mom is important to you. You could decide ON PURPOSE to go. Not begrudgingly, not half-heartedly but all in.
Own your decision to go.
Remember your why and show up graciously.
It just might change the way you experience the whole day.
Or say no and OWN that decision.
Remember your why when you start worrying about any fall out.
You can use this at any time of the year for any event, decision, or choice.
WHY are you doing it?
Do you like your reasons?
And if you choose to do something for someone else, OWN your decision.
I’d love to hear any decisions you’ve been wrestling with and how you might use this. Hit reply and let me know.
Don’t forget we’re talking all December about how to have better holidays inside The GC.
And pssst…these tools aren’t just relevant for the holidays!! It’s just that this time of year there are LOTS of opportunities to use them. 😁