Let Go of Your Armor - Why Letting People in Allows You to Fully Be Yourself
You know what it feels like to armor up. You’re protecting yourself from… The insults from your dad.
The passive/aggressive BS from your boss.
Your friend who calls just to dump on you & then hangs up without ever asking about you.
It hurts, it’s overwhelming, & it’s exhausting.
But, constantly trying to protect yourself from it- putting on your armor-is heavy & exhausting too.
AND if it worked, if it really protected you-you wouldn’t feel like you do after those interactions.
The jabs, barbs, & snarky conversations wouldn’t hit you the same way.
In my group The GC this week I introduced idea of strong back & soft front*
The premise is that many times the “strength” we muster up actually comes from a place of fear, not love.
Over the years & through challenges many of us learned to protect our tender hearts. We were afraid of getting hurt again so we built a wall around our heart or soft under belly, that is armoring up.
The problem with & why this is so important is that when we armor, when we’re defending our hearts, we’re not fully being ourselves.
Instead we are busy proving, people pleasing, or acting stoic. It’s virtually impossible to create authentic connections to others when you can’t show up & be seen as your real self.
AND it’s depleting to constantly carry that armor & try to be who we think we should be.
Putting down the armor allows for a soft front. Which means the world gets to see & you get to be the real you.
To really allow ourselves to soften our front, we need a strong, flexible back which enables you to be tough & tender, vulnerable & courageous, or fierce & kind all at the same time.
Stepping into strong back & soft front is critical inside The GC because we’re there to create genuine connections. To be seen & heard.
I invited the women inside The GC to check in around this practice & ask themselves... is this my strong back or is this my armor? Am I showing up open & willing to receive with a soft front?
If you’re tired of carrying the armor I encourage you to ask yourself these questions. See where you can be strong & flexible out of love rather than fear.
Does the armor sound familiar?
Does it make sense how that could get in the way of being the real you and making genuine connections?
Hit reply & let me know your thoughts. I’d love to hear.
Jen P.S. If you’d like to experience The GC sign up to be the first to know when registration opens again. It’s pretty magical inside. Go here.
*My interpretation of the strong back, soft front concept comes from the work of Brene Brown & Roshi Joan Halifax